Just let go

I'm often surprised at my uncanny ability to ignore valuable corrections. I can see the importance in the corrections and I want to take the advice but many times I don't. I've been thinking about why I do this and it occurred to me that I am overly focused on something else. In last Thursday's class I was working on Koto Gaeshi Kata 6-10 with Sensei Coleman. He made a minor correction to start the grab from the elbow and not the wrist. Four corrections later, I had not accurately made the adjustment once. But why? I only realized several days later that I tend to hold onto my successes as hard as I can. I had learned the footwork and I didn't want to get confused. The footwork required so much of my attention that I couldn't do both. So I would acknowledge the correction, finish my technique, start over and forget the correction! My method was not yielding the kinds of results that I needed.

After the fact, I'm able to realize that when faced with criticism, and when I can only select one; I choose to focus on preventing greater mistakes which would generate greater criticism rather than correcting that which is obviously flawed. Though this is the first time I evaluate this decision on a conscious level, I am pretty sure that this is a life choice which I make on and off the mat.

Within the greater scheme of life, it's a decision that works. It has a clear-cut and functional role in the act of "maintaining". The problem here is that I wasn't trying to maintain a skill which I had already mastered, I was trying to learn a new skill. My approach needs to be entirely different for each task. Though it may sound obvious to you now, it didn't occur to me in the moment! The solution seems counter intuitive, but the answer is to just let go. Focus on the correction and if the footwork goes to hell and I need to be corrected again, then so be it.